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I THINK WE'RE ALONE NOW DOES NATURE!

  • The Stonewall Inn 53 Christopher Street New York, NY, 10014 United States (map)

With their carabiners fully exposed and a couple of old issues of 'Zoobooks' from their dentists’ offices in their back pockets, Colette and Olivia are straight up coming for Bindi Irwin’s coin. Now that the fabled beast Winter has been vanquished once more and the weather feels like how the song “Despacito” sounds and they’ve actually shaved their legs, the ladies of ITWAN are finally opening their front doors and discovering there’s a flashy new It Girl in town and her name is NATURE! Things are alive and everywhere and Colette and Olivia need to talk about it. So join these two hot birches at the Stonewall Inn as they flirt with flora, fawn over fauna, talk shit about rocks (fuck you, rocks!!!!), and reveal what’s inside of their doomsday bunkers. (Spoiler: it’s mostly just S’well bottles filled with La Croix because they know that a Mad Max: Fury Road future is fast approaching, but that doesn’t mean they can’t keep it fashion!!!!)

Tickets will be on sale at the door for $5 cash even though we’re going off the grid, man - we’re gonna live off the land. Seating is first come, first served, so hurry on down to the fire pit because Danny brought his acoustic guitar and he spent the past three months learning all of Green Day’s back catalogue so you know there are gonna be sing-alongs!! There’s a two-drink minimum, cash or card, and each purchase comes with a complimentary handful of loose trail mix that has been living at the bottom of some adventure dude’s backpack since last summer.